F-

There goes the damage deposit.

Dear Theodore Taylor,

I am writing to you today about your YA novel, The Bomb. You may be dead, but I have watched that X-Files episode in which a paranoid computer genius uploaded his consciousness to the internet about 19 times, and I dreamed that my great-grandmother has been trying to find security holes in latest version of Java so she can nag me. Also, I can't find my Ouija board. Let's assume this finds you.

"Oh look, another book about World War Two," I said to myself as I flipped through listings of YA books set in and around the Second World War. I am constantly looking for action-oriented stories for reluctant boy readers, and yours looked like the cover of a Megadeth album, bringing to mind the metal mania of Mustaine, Marty, Menza, and the other band members whose names don't start with M. Explosions! Destruction! Chaos! Sold.

But wait, it's not an action novel. Damn you, Theodore Taylor! It's a tale of dubious morality and value-based conundrums as the imperialist modern era barges into formerly isolated outposts of humanity! There's even a list of discussion questions at the end of the book. YOU TRICKED ME, THEODORE TAYLOR. Instead of rip-roaring fight scenes, I spent 195 pages on painful inevitability reading about Sorry, the teenage Bikinian hellbent on rescuing his home from the most destructive man-made force: ego. Ha ha! I kid. I mean, of course, atomic weaponry. In a matter of days he's ripped from the cocoon of tropical island solitude and tossed aside for an arms race that both befuddles and angers him. As if that weren't fascinating enough, you include chapter interludes that chronicle the birth of the bomb and the process of bringing the bomb to Bikini. A brilliant stroke; as the two narratives come closer and closer to their final confrontation, I was jumping up and down screaming at Sorry to get the h-e-double-hockey-sticks out of there and fold in the face of powers much bigger than him.

The name Sorry: a linguistic coincidence? Cultural oddity? Cheap apology? Does Taylor see himself in Sorry's situation and feel...empathy for him? I don't get it. Last time it was a girl named Capable, now a boy named Sorry. If they had a kid, I guess the logical name choice would be Mediocre. Sure, the name Sorry is memorable and has some significance to the author, but I question the choice. Still, you could have done much worse, such as writing a book about super heroes called Heroes and naming one of the main characters Hiro. That would just be overt pandering, too self-evident, would completely alienate readers, who would laugh it off as hack work, and the venture would tank completely. Right? Answer: Not in television!

The characters are meh, with the exception of Uncle Abram. I get that Sorry is a confused teenager, but he's just not that interesting or sympathetic; for his people as a group, readers may develop feelings, but Sorry is bland, and his life-altering decision seems forced, as does the sentimental moment with his sister, who barely appears in the book, and her favorite doll. Auxiliary characters are there to simply move things along. That's no major detraction, as the plot drives this book all the way home and doesn't even ask for gas money. 

The last fifteen pages are unspeakably intense. The buildup was worth it. Any YA reader craving action will flip their lid at this climax. You can't possibly top this, can you, Theodore Taylor? No way. 

**SPOILER ALERT**

[Not for you, Theodore, you wrote the thing. This is for all two of my readers who may not want to read on for fear of substantial detail ruining the mystery of your book. It's a common term used on the Internet. That this has entered the lexicon vexes me]

Yes way. Mere moments after finishing the story, I picked up the book again to read the afterword, and you hit me in the chops: HE WAS AT THE BIKINI ISLANDS TO ARRANGE THE BOMB TEST. Theodore, I threw the book across the room. It's as close as I've ever come to a KHAAAAAAN! moment. Here was a nice little story about the infamous bomb test and its effect on people who never had a horse in the race, and you throw on top of it the authenticity and credibility of BEING THERE WHEN ALL OF THIS HAPPENED. All of my issues with characterization and narrative flow seem trivial in comparison to this story having churned inside of you for fifty years, waiting to be told.

Okay guys, the scary spoiler is gone!

Interesting Factoid From This Book That May Interest Only Me:

Sorry regards the albatross fly-by as an ominous sign of approaching danger, whereas in European maritime tradition, an albatross sighting is an omen of good luck. 

Thank you for this book with a misleading cover, somewhat flat characters, intense plot, clever structure, and bonus discussion questions so I don't have to think of any. A truly unforgettable work, which asks questions for which we still do not have answers.

Best,
JB

Boring Stuff

The Bomb

Theodore Taylor

2007 Graphia (reissue)

Next: I yell about a boy wonder in Africa. Let's just say it's going to be a BREEZE!